Why I Rarely Buy From Women

A Constructive Critique of Sales Strategies

Based on my diverse experience in different sales environments, I have observed a recurring gap in effective sales techniques between men and women. A recent telesales call highlighted this issue when the representative, upon hearing I was not interested, abruptly ended the call. While I was not rude, simply stating that I could not afford the product at that moment, her reaction was to terminate the conversation. As someone with a background in sales, I tend to analyze such interactions, and this experience reinforced a few observations about ineffective approaches. 

Ineffective sales behaviors

A common sales tactic is to rely on superficial charm. While this can work when a deal is progressing smoothly, it is often a poor substitute for resilience and genuine interest in the customer’s needs. When faced with resistance or rejection, a purely charm-based approach often fails.

For example, on one occasion, after receiving numerous sales calls to my business, I became frustrated and was quite blunt with one male representative. He remained calm and focused, handling the barrage of insults professionally. His composure was so surprising that I ended up apologizing. This exchange showed the power of a relaxed, non-reactive demeanor in defusing tension and keeping the door open for a future sale. In contrast, many of the calls I have observed from female salespeople have ended abruptly once the conversation turned negative. 

The importance of long-term thinking

Another key observation is the difference in how salespeople handle a “no.” Some take it as a permanent rejection, ending the conversation by simply saying “goodbye.” A more effective approach is to leave the door open for future opportunities. An appropriate response might be, “Thank you for your time; I’ll be here if you happen to change your mind.” 

Hearing, “I cannot afford it today” does not mean, “I will not be able to afford it tomorrow.” A genuine, persistent approach, focused on long-term relationship building rather than short-term gain, is a more effective strategy.

Focusing on the customer’s needs

The most successful sales tactics involve prompting the customer to think differently about their needs, without resorting to overly emotional appeals or manipulation. An example from the financial sector highlights this:

• Ineffective approach: “I have your number down as someone who may be interested in investing in the financial markets?”
• Effective challenge: “Ma’am, are you not interested in making money?”
• Ineffective approach: “So this house is too big for for you? ok i`ll let you know when a suitable one becomes available”
• Effective Challenge: ” Madam do you have children?” Yes and “Grandchildren?” Yes “so would`nt it be nice to have them all over to stay over at Christmas?” Yes “and when you get older, they came come over to stay and look after you” Hmmmm show them why it could be beneficial to them.

This second approach reframes the question to focus on a potential benefit to the customer, encouraging them to consider the opportunity rather than immediately rejecting it.

Ultimately, great salesmanship is about being a genuinely helpful person who is knowledgeable and proud of the product. It is about emotional regulation, resilience, and patience. Relying on charm or becoming emotional when faced with rejection is less effective than staying calm, respectful, and genuinely engaged in the long-term

Authenticity: Using charm in a manipulative or “fake” way that can damage relationships and cause others to distrust you. People eventually see through attempts to get what you want by being inauthentic.